One of my audience asked me if she should explain anxiety to new partner. And, how can she do that without harming her romantic relationship? That is the reason why I decided to write this blog.
Relationships can be tricky, especially when you are in the midst of one. It is important to be mindful of certain things to help make sure that your relationship is a success and not a disaster. If you are in a serious relationship, you suffer from anxiety, and you consider venting your situation on your partner, this article is for you.
How can anxiety affect relationships?
Anxiety is a feeling of uneasiness in the body or mind. It can be triggered by many things, such as stress, worries, and fear of the unknown. People who suffer from anxiety may also struggle with obsessive thoughts, like worry about their health or performance at work.
Anxiety disorders are distinct from normal feelings of nervousness and distress, and they can cause significant interference with a person's ability to function day-to-day. Anxiety can affect your relationships when it gets out of hand. It can make you feel like your partner is not there for you and that you are alone in your struggle.
You can also fear that your boyfriend or girlfriend loses interest in you. This is especially true when you have just been involved in a new relationship. You guys have not gotten to know each other well in the early stage. If you feel that anxiety is damaging your new relationship, you had better explain anxiety to new partner.
Should explain anxiety to new partner?
It might be difficult to tell a new partner that you have a mental illness. You may be concerned that what you will say may put them off. You may be concerned that the conversation will go wrong, that you'll be harmed, or that they'll never react positively. You could be unsure if it's essential to divulge this information at all, or you might believe it's not a smart idea to define oneself in this way.
Although it's a great idea to talk about your anxiety at some time in your relationship, you shouldn't place too much pressure on yourself. You had better only do so when you feel ready. When you sense it would be useful and essential to explain anxiety to new partner, now is the time to do so. It's crucial to avoid stigmatizing yourself or thinking of your mental well-being as a barrier to establishing effective relationships.
👉Related Reading: Best Anxiety-Free Jobs for People with Social Anxiety
Tips to explain anxiety to new partner
Write everything down in a letter
Speaking about anxiety might sometimes make you feel anxious. In certain situations, I recommend drafting a letter to your companion. If you really can talk about your symptoms & triggers in person, this would help you and your partner come up with a coping strategy together.
If not, you can pen everything you want to pour out in a letter. Below is a letter that one girl with anxiety writes to her boyfriend. You can read to be inspired and motivated.
Explain your feelings and dangerous situations
I tried my hardest to put the feelings of anxiety into words. It's another thing to admit when you suffer from anxiety. I will tell you that the greatest approach to describing a scenario is to demonstrate it.
It's better to communicate the physical & emotional symptoms you're experiencing to your partner who doesn't experience anxiety. Describe in full the situations that cause bodily symptoms, the circumstances in which they occur, and the emotions that result.
Tell them how they can help
Most of the time, your spouse wishes to know how they can support you emotionally. However, treating someone with anxiety might be like tiptoeing on eggs at times. You can cry more when you are hugged by your loved one. It all boils down to stepping carefully. Your spouse will feel compelled to protect you.
Discuss what you and your spouse should and shouldn't do. As a tactic, make a list of things they can do to assist you cope. So, they can feel like they're contributing to your mental health. This might include self-care reminders, avoiding triggers, or anxiety-reduction practices.
Make them know words might trigger your anxiety
It's all too easy for your partner who doesn't suffer from anxiety to ignore yours. He/she might say something seemingly normal but trigger your anxiety. Therefore, you had better familiarize him/ her with all of your trigger words, phrases, and situations. People don't often realize that words like "simply don't think of it anymore" or "just calm down" might really cause tension.
You may experience an emotional reaction as a result of your anxiety. But, you may also experience an emotion as a result of your partner's frustration. Guide them in recognizing the distinction between these feelings.
Separate what makes you upset.
When you are experiencing anxiety, your partner may believe he/she did something wrong, which makes you angry. But, in fact, it was truly your anxiety causing your mood instability.
Alternatively, they may believe your anxiety made you upset rather than their wrongdoings.To deal jointly, discuss both scenarios with your partner. And, say what makes you upset clearly to avoid misunderstanding if necessary.
Is it normal to be anxious in a new relationship?
Yes, it’s totally normal even for people without mental illness. When you step into a new relationship, you love someone new who you haven’t known well. And, you are expected to be curious about your partner as well as anxious about the future of this relationship.
You might be hurt by your ex. In this sense, you will need some time to heal your heart in a new romantic relationship. You also take more time to build up faith and confidence in your partner’s loyalty and love for you. If you feel unsafe or anxious, you are encouraged to explain anxiety to new partner so that they can comprehend you better.
Explain anxiety to new partner: Final words
There's no disputing that anxiety may have an impact on your love life. Being open about it with your companion might help them prepare for the worst-case situation. Anxiety is nothing to be embarrassed about, and getting your partner on board with it can help you manage it effectively.
